I Could Do A More Intelligent Design of Humans

Who is the "Intelligent Designer"?

Creationists try to evade the question because they want to pretend that their theory is non-religious. But if it isn't the Christian God, then who is it?

We can get an idea of his skills. First he is very lazy: he used pretty much the same design for just about all the primates. Humans and monkeys share 98% of their genes, and the different ones are almost all concerned with the brain and changes to the skull to accomodate that bigger brain.

One of the interesting things that all mammals share is the nerve which controls the noises which come out of our mouths. This branch of the vagus nerve(literally "wandering nerve") starts at the voice box and goes to the base of the brain. In humans the distance it needs to travel is a few centimetres. But the nerve is actually nearly half a metre long because it doesn't take a direct route. It goes down the body to the top of the heart, winds around the aorta, and then goes back up to the brain. In the giraffe that same design is even sillier, because it goes down the neck from the top of the head to the heart and then all the way back up the neck to the brain. It's fourteen feet long in an adult. Evolution explains that because all mammals have a common ancestor, and the nerve design has worked so it stayed the same. Intelligent Design explains it by ....?

Just about everybody over the age of 40 will tell you they have or have had 'a bad back' when they've ricked their spine lifting something the wrong way. We know it's a crappy design - it works ok if you're a chimp swinging through the trees, but it doesn't work well for bipeds. Again evo explains that we have come from an ancestor who lived in the trees and evolution just makes the best of the materials it already has. But why would an intelligent designer be so lazy and incompetent?

We can tell that the designer also didn't like women. This laziness in keeping the basic chimp design caused serious problems with childbirth. If the pelvis was too wide in animals walking upright, their stomachs would fall out, given the muscles that we have down there. So the pelvic opening has to be quite small. But our babies are born with big heads to accommodate their big brains. Until the last 200 years, when we applied science to medicine and came up with anaesthetics and survivable Caesarean operations, women had about a 20% chance of dying in childbirth. Simple lesson - science saves lives; god/intelligent designer kills off 20%.

Look around you. Look at all the fat people. Evolution says that we have so many land whales because our bodies evolved to store fat whenever it was available, because those who didn't, starved during the famines which inevitably occurred. We are the descendants of the good fat-storers. The bad fat-storers didn't live long enough to pass on their genes. Similarly our bodies are adapted to very occasional sugar treats (finding a bees nest and stealing honey) as opposed to our endless supply of sweets and sugar drinks. But apparently the 'intelligent designer' wasn't intelligent enough to anticipate the new environment of the last 50 years.

So again, who is the 'designer'? He is criminally lazy (re-uses old designs even when it's harmful), he is short-sighted (didn't realize his design would become obsolete today) and so clearly isn't omniscient. He is either malevolent and evil in that it took science to rescue woman from early death in childbirth, or else he just doesn't care. Do any of these qualities match the idea of the christian god?

So what are these heretics doing, suggesting that the Creator is someone or something that is obviously not the God of Genesis?

Why Would An Intelligent Designer Do Such a Crap Job?

I Could Do A More Intelligent Design of Humans

I Could Do A More Intelligent Design of Nature

Index