Silly Stories

Tower of Babel

God got upset when his people decided to build a tower "all the way to heaven". It was made of brick, and must have been really really high, like about maybe 5 stories....



And ever since then, nobody has dared erect a high building, because obviously that would be defying the will of God, and obviously he will punish them ....

Jesus the Merciful

And as for these enemies of mine who didn't want me to be their king - bring them in and execute them right here in front of me. - Jesus (Luke 19:27)

2 Kings 2:23-24 NKJV
Then he went up from there to Bethel; and as he was going up the road, some youths came from the city and mocked him, and said to him, "Go up, you baldhead! Go up, you baldhead!" So he turned around and looked at them, and pronounced a curse on them in the name of the LORD. And two female bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the youths.

Deuteronomy 23:1 ESV
No one whose testicles are crushed or whose male organ is cut off shall enter the assembly of the Lord.

KJV
He that is wounded in the stones, or hath his privy member cut off, shall not enter into the congregation of the LORD.

Genesis 38:8-10 NASB
Then Judah said to Onan, "Go in to your brother's wife, and perform your duty as a brother-in-law to her, and raise up offspring for your brother." Onan knew that the offspring would not be his; so when he went in to his brother's wife, he wasted his seed on the ground in order not to give offspring to his brother. But what he did was displeasing in the sight of the LORD; so He took his life also.

Judges 3:21-22 ESV
And Ehud reached with his left hand, took the sword from his right thigh, and thrust it into his belly. And the hilt also went in after the blade, and the fat closed over the blade, for he did not pull the sword out of his belly; and the dung came out.

KJV
And Ehud put forth his left hand, and took the dagger from his right thigh, and thrust it into his belly: And the haft also went in after the blade; and the fat closed upon the blade, so that he could not draw the dagger out of his belly; and the dirt came out.

Deuteronomy 25:11-12 NASB
If two men, a man and his countryman, are struggling together, and the wife of one comes near to deliver her husband from the hand of the one who is striking him, and puts out her hand and seizes his genitals, then you shall cut off her hand; you shall not show pity.